The city of Danbury is looking to shut down massage parlors they say operate as fronts for prostitution. Danbury officials are attempting to thwart illegal sex trafficking and the sex trade through shutting down the last few parlors they suspect cater to "Johns."

Our partners down the hall went right to the top to get the word from Danbury Mayor Mark Boughton this morning:

This, as always, was an important exchange of useful information. We learned from the Mayor that although we all pretty much know what goes on in these places and where they are, they need probable cause to go after them. We also were able to teach the Mayor some terms that will be useful in sniffing out this probable cause. You can't enforce the law on "the streets" unless you speak the language of "the streets." We taught him about:

  • D.D.G. - "Drop Dead Gorgeous"
  • F.B.S.M. - "Full Body Sensual Massage"

We left out definitions for almost everything else because if you don't know what they are, ya probably don't like 'em and would not want them explained. The unauthorized investigation into these backroom operations will continue. Don't tell anyone, but here's my cover:

  • Rufus Esparanza
    • Jazz Flutist
    • 6'
    • 185 lbs
    • Red Hair
    • Red Skin
    • Red mustache
    • Red all over
    • Wears Members Only jacket, Acid Wash, "High Water" jeans and braided belt.
    • Boost Mobil flip phone on belt clip.
    • Subway My Way Rewards Card Member

I don't go for filthy, filthy crime in my city. I'm diggin' and I'm sniffin'. When all the diggin' and sniffin' is done, we will be left with a healthy, steaming pile of justice and a side of truth.

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