I love Connecticut.

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I love our history, architecture, food and people but what I love most about life in the Nutmeg State is complaining. Connecticut people have a great sense of humor and live to shred their own environment. That is how I know you're going to like this guy, he goes by dhtoomey on Tik Tok and he gave Connecticut a beating in a November '23 video.

@dhtoomey My TED Talk #connecticut #nyc #foryou ♬ original sound - Dan Toomey

Just to review, we are:

  • New York City's worst borough.
  • A cultureless anus of a state.
  • Too small to be important, too big to be cute.
  • The most generic, tasteless block of land you could pickleball your way into a state.
  • Trust fund dirt weasels who work in New York, ski in Vermont, vacation in Martha's Vineyard and die in Jacksonville.
  • Allbirds wearing cash guzzlers who call Harlem "ghetto" and pilates buddies "chicas."
  • A saltine cracker on a map smeared with generations of people who quote The Office too much.

AND:

  • No one cares less about our state than us.
  • Our state penis is 1/80 the size of Florida's.
  • Our state celebrities are essentially a bucket of yuck.

It's funny because it's true with one exception, you can never quote The Office too much, it's just not possible. That was the only thing that bordered on offending me, the rest was brilliant and I'll be reaching out to dhtoomey to book him on the I-95 Morning Show faster than you can say Samuel L. Chang.

Check out the Ethan, Lou & Large Dave Podcast on Apple and Spotify

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